Tuesday was one of those days…I was having a sliiight pity party for one and going down a social media rabbit hole didn’t make matters better. Instead of reflecting on my accomplishments, I went straight to comparison and the ugly thoughts of:
“sh*t it’s almost the end of the year, WTF have I done?!”
“damn she’s so young and killing it, FML”
“andddd another role I couldn’t get into the room for”
“I really haven’t gotten in many rooms [casting director’s offices] this year, so I suck”
“I’m not going to make it in LA”
etc. etc. etc.
Yep. Those nasty fuckers (aka thoughts) crept in real hard. With the end of the year coming in full speed ahead, it’s pretty easy to feel those WTF did I do this year thoughts? Admittedly, I’m still hung up on the fact that I don’t have a TV credit to my name. I’m SAG eligible, and my auditions this episodic season have been lackluster.
But I know it’s dumb to hold on to the negative.
I mean I was a lead in a movie this year! Number 2 on the call sheet baby. I filmed another fun role later in the summer and managed to pass my level one somm exam. Can’t take that away from me.
Admittedly my fall quarter I slowed down on the social media game and didn’t post much to my blog. But hey, like nature, we all have cycles and shouldn’t beat ourselves up about it.
So, friendly reminder if you’re feeling down or beating yourself up in the comparison game- just tell those bad thoughts to SHUT IT OFF.
Pour yourself a glass (or 2 of wine) and throw on your favorite show, go on a run, read the book that’s been on your nightstand for months (is that just me?!), make some cookies, whatever makes you happy and tell yourself life is marathon and not a sprint. Best to enjoy yourself along the way, because if you can’t learn to do that on your ride to your top- then how can you expect to appreciate your life when you success comes your way?! Biggie wasn’t lying when he said “more money, more problems”. There’s always going to be something “more”, so enjoy the now.
Kick ASS today. Keep dreaming BIG. And do something for yourself that’ll make you smile. Even if it’s just for a few moments. Soak it in, and repeat on the reg.
P.S. I followed this recipe and drank a chilled Pinot Noir. A+ combo (just sub dark chocolate chips for milk when making the cookies!)